I'll be okay.
I'm looking forward that it will be soon.
I’m just afraid now.
Afraid that nobody will love me.
Afraid that nobody will look at me the way he looked at me when he fell in love with me.
Afraid to be alone.
That's why I’m still clinging to something that keeps on giving me pain...
because of the thought of that something… someone… just being there… even causing me pain... makes me feel okay and makes me think that I will get the future that I want.
To not to be alone and to have a family of my own.
That I’m going to settle in time.
But I’m confused.
I’m so confused.
I also feel like I’m running out of time.
Because I’m a woman
and men love young girls.
I’m going to be old. Heck, I’m already old.
People can say I’m not that old. But I am.
People are getting married... My high school batchmates are starting to have babies… and I’m still here…
dealing with some shitty, immature problems.
And it's also stressing me out.
The fact that I’m overthinking these things is also stressing me out.
There's a constant battle inside my head and I don’t know what to believe,
what to do,
the right things to do.
because I’m afraid.
I’m afraid that what I’ll do will just give me consequences in the end.
I’m afraid to commit mistakes.
And I don’t know anymore what to do.
It just makes me cry.
And that’s all I can do.
Cry over these nonsense things.
Cry because I am crying.
SHARE THIS ARTICLE:
A person who affects great love of art, music, poetry, etc., and indifference to practical matters.
El Esthete or The Aesthete in English, is where I share my Literary works, artworks, and everything else in between.
I'm thrilled you're here.
Let's GET TO KNOW each other.
Join the tribe:
Zine Orgy: 4play
May 11, 2017, 7PM-12MN, 77 Events Place